I have just done more than 200 questions this day, and i am sure it will be more. Sometimes i am afraid of this national exam, maybe because of i failed on my elementary national exam. but sometimes i think "why must i be afraid of the national exam?" it's useless, till now i still can't find the match reason. sometimes, imagine getting bad score is maybe the nearest reason...but, that's not the point. i am still not satisfied with the reason. confused. let's forget it. now i am being afraid *again...for more than 4 times this day. my heart beats quicker now. i believe i can solve it. let's go the second point.
i need to cry, it has been quite long i never cry. at past almost everyday i cried and it gave good reaction to myself. but now? it seems i don't have any feelings haha, i never cry (probably because i have crossed my heart (=promised) not to cry again....but yeaaah i think my promise is totally big mistake, because i still feel strange with this situation. imagine, when my friends were crying in an event but how about me? i kept silent, i didn't cry....maybe in that time my friends were thinking that i didn't have feeling). too bad. i need to cry cry deeply.
the third point that i want to tell in this post is I've decided not to like someone (fall in love with someone). is it a weird decision? i hope it isn't because....liking someone sometimes disturbs me. so i hope in senior high later i don't like someone like i used to in junior high. i really want to go serious with my education.